Three years ago, one of my HS bestfriends got married and I was her maid of honor. During the reception, I was so busy assisting the guests and sadly, I wasn't able to join the highlight of the reception -- the bouquet throwing. After the event, I told the boyfriend this "I was so busy, too bad I wasn't able to join the bouquet throwing. And besides, I couldn't find you." (He was also invited but I lost sight of him because I'm busy with MOH duties Haha!). He responded, "Don't worry baby, we'll have that in our own wedding. You'll be one throwing the bouquet and I'll be throwing the panty". I was shocked -- "Panty????? Anong panty???" He said as a matter of factly, "Di ba? Yung kinukuha ng groom sa bride tas binabato?". HAHAHA! I almost died. I gave him a lecture on that and he told me he really doesn't pay attention during wedding receptions. Lol. Fiiine. That conversation made me realize that we are not yet ready to get married. C'mon, who wants to get married if your underwear will be thrown during the reception??!!?
Every time I look at my Facebook newsfeed, it's filled with stories like friends getting engaged, friends getting married, friends giving birth and me getting awesome (lels). A lot of times during reunions, people would ask me "So when are you getting married?" and I most of the time I would answer "In a near distant future." Haha! I believe that before tying the knot, 3 basic things are important:
1. You are getting married for the right reasons.
When my single friends would tell me "Gusto ko na ikasal", I ask them why. It's very important that a person should be marrying for the right reasons. Why bother getting involved with someone for a long period of time? It's like enrolling in a freshman year and not planning to graduate.
2. You know your partner's dark secrets... and you've accepted it.
My boyfriend's dark secret is... well it's a secret. Lol. But seriously, in any relationship acceptance and compromise are very important. I've read this one in markmanson.net: The artist Alex Grey once said, "True love is when two people's pathologies complement one another's". Love is, by definition, crazy and irrational. And the best love works when our irrationalities complement one another and our flaws enamor one another. It may be our perfections that attract one another but it's our imperfections that decide whether we stay together or not. I think the purpose of love is to practice the loving. No person is going to be a hundred percent perfect anyway, so learn to appreciate people for what they have to offer.
3. You have the funds.
Money is not everything, but I admit that it's important. I'm not talking about the money for the wedding only but for the days after the wedding. Starting a family is not an easy task and being financially stable makes it a little easier.
It's true that when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as possible. And in my case, I want it as soon as possible. I think I'm okay with first two items above and I'm now building 3.
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