Always remain faithful to Him

'nuff said.

...

I want to get lost so I'll be able to find myself. So where do I begin?

Dear God, I really really need you right now. :(

incoherent thoughts

I was looking for an inspiration when I decided to drop by Patty Laurel's blog. Her blog has always been a source of inspiration whenever I'm having bad vibes. I liked what she wrote today about the art of kindness. I'm not ALWAYS kind. I'm just SOMETIMES kind. I can be kind if I want to. But sometimes, when I'm pissed off with life, I tend to be irritable and stubborn and annoying and bad. It's hard to show kindness when the world isn't that kind to you. I always think that if something bad is happening to me, it's part of my karma because I'm not so good in the past. Knowing that, I've decided to change for the better. I always put in mind that kindness begets kindness. Goodness begets goodness. Love begets love? Hmmm, I don't think so. I'd like to think it is. I'm still not sure on that one. I've given love but then I was only disappointed with people. Maybe I expected too much of them. But oh well. I'm still not tired of giving love.

Right now, I'm not going to pretend that I'm not anymore pissed off with my life. I still am. So does that mean I'll be irritable and stubborn and annoying and bad? Nah. I don't think so. It takes a lot of effort to be positive when negative things are happening to you. But I'm trying and it's always good to try.

I've made so many mistakes in my past, too many to enumerate--- think a whole yellow pad of sins and wrong-doings, that I wish I could take all back. But I can't. I have no control over what I've done in the past, but I'm blessed to have the NOW and the FUTURE in my hands. So you hit the reset button and start over. --> This is what Patty Laurel said in her blog and I can so relate. And mind you, mine wasn't just a whole yellow pad of sins, mine was a ream of legal paper, make it two reams pa! Ganun kadami! I've had issue with "past" thing and really no matter how I try to change it, I simply just can't. But I'm proud to say that I've already learned from it. I'm not proud of my past but somehow, I'm thankful for it for it made me a better person.

I'm not really making a point right now. My thoughts are all in a disaster mode but I just feel like saying all of this. I hope to be more inspired tomorrow because I've been uninspired with life lately.

So to keep me sane, I'm reading a poem by Mother Theresa.

"People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. Be honest and sincere anyway.
What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, will often be forgotten. Do good anyway.
Give the best you have, and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway.
In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway."

i want a dog!

i love love love dogs!!! i want one!!!

Happy AnniCHINAry!:)

March 25, 2011. I've conquered the Great Wall of China!!! Wooooot! One down on my bucket list. *clap* clap*

I haven't blogged about my Beijing trip last year just because...hmm...I'm lazy? Hahaha or because I'm such a loser when it comes to blogging. Anyway, since today marks the anniversary of my China trip, I'll try to write a decent post about my travel in the world's most populous country. I'm so lucky because a friend of mine was staying at Beijing at that time and offered to let me and my friend Keith stay at his apartment. Hurray for free accommodation!!!:D

My travel to Beijing was my second out-of-the-country trip. Well, literally it was the second because I've been to Tokyo before (Thanks to Kumon yay) but I really considered this one my first real out-of-the-country trip. Partly because this travel is for leisure and I paid for everything. Huhu naubos savings ko. Nevertheless, I don't regret it! I really really need to travel during that time. Why? See previous previous post. Hahaha!

Question: Why China? Friends usually ask me that. Pwede naman HK or SG. But why why why of all places in Asia, I chose BJ. Yeah, I know it's not usual "travel" place. Hey,I chose to go China because I've been dying to climb the Great Wall. Bakit ba nagingialam kayo?! Hahaha!

Lovely was supposed to go with us. Sadly, her work didn't permit it so only Keith and I braved the Chinese. Lol! Let the pictures speak for themselves. This one is my best travel so far!!

We left PH at around 7pm. We arrived at Beijing Airport at exactly 12 midnight. Kita mo ang mga excited!! Pati sa escalator nagpapicture! Mwahaha!

Welcome to Chinaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. We're heeeere.

We were fetched at the airport by my friend Andrew and we headed straight to his apartment. He's a pure Chinese by the way. It's been three years since I last saw him. Good thing I was still able to recognize his face. Puro kasi singkit mga nandun. Nakakalito! Hahaha! And oh, the temperature at that time was freaking 5 degrees Celsius!! Pffft. When Andrew saw us, he asked "Guys, are you sure you're going out without changing your jackets?" Ang tapang ko pa when I said yes. But after a few steps outside, I said "Okay. Let's go back. I'm changing my jacket". Wahaha!

Amazed by the "leafless" tree at the back. Yun talaga yung gusto ko picturan!

It took us 40 minutes to get to his apartment. I realized BJ's airport is far far far away from the city. Even if I didn't catch some sleep on the plane, I'm wide awake! I'm like a child staring outside the taxi window enjoying the view, tulo laway pa! Haha! I had my jaw dropped the entire time as we pulled up to his place. Upon arriving at his place, we chatted for a while and then slept at 3am. Keith and I have to wake up early because the Great Wall tour guide will be picking us up at 6am!

FIRST DAY: Great Wall, Ming Tombs, Jade Factory, Silk Factory, Tea Party

Sadly, Andrew couldn't join us in this trip because he had to go to work. Keith and I are on our own. Andrew just wrote his address on a piece of paper and instructed us that if we get lost, we can just show the taxi driver that piece of paper. Oh noes. Pano pala kung ibang address nakasulat dun no? Haha! We wouldn't even know because it's written in Chinese characters! Hehe.. So we took a cab to some place (see I don't even know the name of the place!) where we met up with the tour guide. Together with other eager beaver tourists, the adventuuuuuuure began!

On our way to Jade Factory

Our first stop was at the Jade Factory. Everything is sooooo expensive! All I was able to afford was a small jade stamp with my name written in Chinese characters. Pampaswerte daw so I bought one.

They are so expensive. Pa-picture na lang ako libre pa haha!

Yes, it's so cold even if the sun is shining bright.

After that we went to Ming Tombs. The sights are all overwhelming. We were always left behind by the group because we're so busy taking pictures! Maski puno pinipicturan namin! Puno in China, poste in China, bato in China. Everything in China! Picture lang ng picture! Lol. I remember one tourist told us "You Filipinos like to take pictures". Uhhh.. hindi..hindi naman ahh. =))

I secretly took a picture of our group in case we get lost, papakita lang namin pictures nila. Haha! As if! Anyway, ayun. The guy in red. He was the one who told us that we like taking pictures. At dahil dyan, nagpapicture na lang kami sakanya. Lol. Good job kuya.

Emperor's tomb with LOTS of money. Kainggit! Patay na, kumikita pa. Haha!

We had lunch at a restaurant before heading to the Great Wall. The food is so delicious! I really love Chinese food. Fave ko ang Chinese food! And this one is authentic Chinese food! Not the usual yangchow fried rice served in the Philippines. *drools* I don't know the names of the food basta lafang na lang ng lafang!

After eating, we went to the Mutianyu section of the Great Wall through a cable car. This part of the Great Wall is less crowded so basically we had the whole walls all to ourselves. Kahit magpagulong gulong ako pababa, okay lang. Yebah! Occasionally, we'll see random Chinese who will lure us into buying stuff. We bought a "certificate" that certifies that we've climbed the Great Wall. Like duh. Haha! And it costs us a lot of yuan!

On our way up the Great Wall!

Wohoooo! I've conquered the Great Wall!

Some wacky Chinese. Siya talaga nagpapicture samin

This is the longest walk I've had so far. The wall is never ending and the steps are so steep! I certainly underestimated the climb. "Ain't about the how fast I get there. Ain't about what's waiting on the other side. It's the cliiiiimb". Nyahaha!

After the three or four hour walk, we returned to the same starting point and took the Toboggan down. Now, this is the BEST part. Ride for liiiiiiiiiife!

Scary yung warning sign.

Haha yikeee takot si ate.

Now my turn. Wohooo!

After the ride, we were greeted by another Chinese in his I-don't-know-what-he-is costume. Of course we can't understand him! All I know is that he wants us to take a picture with him. So we agreed. But lo and behold! After two shots, he was extending his hand and saying "100 yuan". What the?!?! He tricked us! Kala ko naman nagandahan lang siya samin at gusto lang magpapicture. Pfffft. Now I know why most Chinese are rich! Hehe.. Business kung business.

We went to Silk Factory afterwards and attended a Tea Party. I'm not much of a fan of teas, well unless it's a milk tea. But I can say I learned a lot from the tour. That's how our Day 1 in Beijing went.

P.S. We got lost but thanks to the piece of paper Andrew gave us, we were able to return to his apartment earlier than expected. I shall write about Day 2 and Day 3 soon.:)

i miss my girlfriends

I've been disconnected to the world for quite some time right now. I've deactivated my Facebook account and I barely open my Twitter. I sometimes don't reply to text messages and I'm always invisible on ym. I don't like people asking me how I was 'coz I don't know how to answer that question, too. *sigh* What's happening to me?! @.@ I know a lot of my friends are worried about me...Well, I'm not okay. But I will be...soon. I hope.

While looking for some files in my laptop, I saw this picture and it made me miss my girlfriends. I know they've been updating each other more than often now that they're all using Blackberry. Ayayay. For now, I seriously miss them. :(

I'm missing a lot of people lately...most especially...

I'm not FAT-ty

I'm NOT fat. If I try to convince people that I am getting fatter, they would just roll their eyes and say "yeah right whatever". My usual weight ranges only from 88lbs - 94lbs. Goodness! 'Di man lang umabot ng 95lbs hahaha! I will swear it is easier to lose weight than to gain weight. I did everything just to get fat - drank all sorts of vitamins, enrolled in a gym, drank weigh protein, even deworming (yuck,haha pero buti na lang wala talaga eh) and of course LAMON. I out ate everyone else. My guy friends doesn't want to sit next to me if we're having a buffet. Ang takaw takaw ko daw kasi at isa akong kalaban. Mwahaha! Eating is my second favorite hobby next to sleeping. Lol.

Hay, the only parts of my body that gets fat are my tummy, my cheeks and surprise surprise, my CHIN. Rawr. I don't get it. I'm so thin yet I'm sporting a double chin. Huhu. Bakit ganuuuuuun. Unfaiiiiir. Sana nadistribute na lang yung fats sa braso ko or sa pwet ko. Haha that would be better!:) While looking at my old pics, I discovered that I'm double chin-ny ever since I was a kid! Aha! So does that mean forever na ko may ganito? Huhu I'm cursed! Why why why?! I remember one former officemate commented "Si Tricia? Di naman tumataba yan eh. Yung tumataba lang sakanya yung pisngi niya saka chin niya" Mygaaaaash. May point nga naman. I must do some chin-ups instead of sit-ups. Haha!

I can accept the fact that I'm sporting a double chin at that age because I'm not a thin baby. Plus, I still look cute on that pic. Hahaha! But now, look at that! The double chin is so out of place!!! Hahaha!

i got mail! :)

What a way to end my day! I got a letter from my long-distance-bestfriend slash soul sister Earl. It was on top of my drawer when I got home. Since I have low EQ, I instantly opened it and read it while having dinner.

Earl's letter made me happy and sad at the same time. Happy because it's been a while since I received a letter from her. Sad because she told me not to get sad anymore about the whole *insert name here* thing (I'm sorry friend, I can't help but feel sad about it hehe) It also made me feel guilty. It's been ages since I've sent her a mail. I hope she forgives me for that. Lol. So, I promised myself to write her one during the Holy week.

I love receiving letters. I think I love receiving letters more than receiving gifts. I guess it's because letters require more "effort" to make and they are more sentimental. And oh, I especially love it more if it's handwritten. I have a box where I put all the letters I've received since elementary. Yeah right, I'm a very sappy person. Haha! I prefer snail mail over e-mail because of the journey it went through. Buti pa ang letter ko naka-travel all the way from Texas to Manila!

I also love writing letters. I know some things are better said in person but whenever I'm having a hard time telling someone how I feel, I'd rather course it through a letter. I'm not good at writing though and I'm not good at speaking too. But if I were to choose, I'd be choosing the former.

This is not good. :(

f*ck f*ck f*ck

i miss my (ab)normal, happy self. i don't want the abnormal, sad version of myself.

haaaaaaaaaay.